There are warnings on packs of cigarettes. And yet there aren’t warnings on packs of bullets. There are signs which forbid running by the pool. And yet there aren’t signs which forbid police batons from bashing in the skulls of running protestors.
There are laws mandating seatbelts, helmets and child passenger safety requirements. But there are no laws requiring simple decency in the tone of your voice when blasting a 63-year old waitress for taking 37-seconds to get your 4th cup of bottomless coffee.
No wonder bankers got away with robbing the American People. There was nothing in the fine print of the bailout mandating bankers to be ashamed of themselves, mandating bankers attempt everything possible to restore public trust or face the consequence of enduring the unendurable task of having to rake their own damn leaves from their own damn hot tub in their 7th obnoxious mansion overlooking the $13M Ford Compound in Beaver Creek, Colorado.
That’s what pool services are for.
We don’t care. It’s easier to let them off the hook than it is to hold bankers accountable. We don’t care. It’s easier to light candles and hold vigils than it is to protect future parents from the inevitability of learning about their children being reduced to moving targets at yet another school shooting.
We don’t care. It’s easier to pretend we’re a tolerant society, where our president has always supported Gay Equality, than it is to extradite and prosecute Dmitri Kisilev, Deputy General Director of the Russian State Television and Radio Broadcasting Company, who went on the country’s most popular news program and said this…
“I think that just imposing fines on Gays and Homosexual Propaganda among teenagers is not enough. They should be banned from donating blood, sperm. And their hearts, in case of the automobile accident, should be buried in the ground or burned as unsuitable for the continuation of life.”
Remember when the GOP booed a Gay Soldier, serving in harms-way, during their convention? Instead of overseeing an irrelevant cable access show in Russia, Dmitri Kisilev should move to the United States of America and run for the GOP Nomination in 2016.
Not to worry, since he’s white, there will be no need for a long-form birth certificate.
What gives? What’s the deal? What’s with these people?
They’re little more than bullies who’ve been appointed by the bullies we unanimously elect, year after year, to keep us in a constant state of crisis, as if we never left the playground, and the cruel son-of-a-bitch who’s the first to get a growth spurt, along with pubes, gets to rain down terror on the rest of us who are waiting helplessly for our hormones to kick in.
Police aren’t authority figures. Not really. Police are grown-ups with guns and badges we employ.
Judges aren’t authority figures. Not really. Judges are grown-ups with robes and gavels we employ.
Politicians aren’t authority figures. Not really. Politicians are grown-ups with stupid flag pins in stupid lapels we employ.
Maybe it’s a sign. Maybe we need a sign. Maybe it’s a warning. Maybe we need a warning.
Maybe it’s a Lincoln Town Car with a disclaimer stenciled onto the hood: whatever you are, whatever you think you are, whatever your role, whatever you think your role includes, more than anything else, remember this, you are a grown-up first, and if you abdicate your adulthood by behaving like a brat, if you keep looking the other way as our kids are gunned-down, if you keep looking the other way as Gay Kids are needlessly humiliated, if you keep looking the other way as bankers abscond with hard-earned dough-ray-me, we’ll shove leaves in your mouth and drown you in the hot tub.