Dad thinks the reason Blade Runner killed his girlfriend is simple: Guns. I think it’s more complex: Steroids and Guns. Steven thinks it’s way more complex: Guns, Steroids, Habeas Corpus, Alien Abductions and the Magna Carta.
What’s the world coming to? Apparently, besides shooting a bitch when you don’t want to fuck her anymore, it’s suddenly frowned upon to slap the shit out of crying children on airplanes.
Here are the 3 main jobs of the men & women who serve tiny drinks on airplanes…
1) serve tiny drinks to big, fat alcoholics
2) wake us up from a deep sleep to make a bullshit fuss about upright seats
3) slap the shit out of crying children when the parents have clearly abdicated their parenting role
It’s thankless work, even at 30,000 feet. Hey, no one gets thanked for their work, not anymore, not even The Pope, which is why he’s quitting. Turns out, Benedict is tired of being taken for granted by his imaginary friend.
Nothing’s real, not anymore, not even the deficit.
When a dumb president declares 2 dumb wars, and funds those wars with tax cuts, it’s surreal how fast you can turn record surpluses into insurmountable debt. I’m tired of hearing about raising taxes on the wealthy. How about raising taxes on everyone?!!
Otherwise, we’ve abdicated our role as grown ups. Shoot us. Slap us. Wake us the fuck up. Even the Aliens have lost interest in abduction.
They don’t get-off on anally probing spoiled brats.